This story begins in August, when I
realize that Beantown’s annual college tournament must be approaching, and
every year I think about reaching out to the team and offering them some books,
and this year I actually did it. I circle the practice fields, in the shadow of
the Harvard coliseum, sorting out the best place to park, realizing that while
climbing a fence may have worked in my playing days, I was not about to lug or hoist
25-pound boxes of books with me over or under a fence. I finally park in a civilized manner
on Western Avenue across from the Bus Stop pub, another old familiar landmark.
Walking out onto the field, dewy grass underfoot, I feel like the old Doc
Graham character in the movie, Field of
Dreams, and half expect to look down and see my business casual khakis and
work shirt transform magically into rugby shorts and jersey, Clarks into
cleats, skin and bones into muscle again. Alas, no. As the sun sinks lower in the sky, the heat of
the day slowly eases and surrenders to cooler waves of air moving across the
field. It’s a beautiful night for rugby practice. There must be forty players
circled up. I smile, recalling the Alma Mater statue at the University of
Illinois, with a figure, arms outstretched, and the inscription: “To thy happy
children of the future those of the past send greetings.” Or, in this case,
books!
A couple of weeks later, I am talking to A Guy
in the publishing world, and he asks how the book is doing. “Great,” I say, “I’ve
filled one notebook and started into the next, making good progress.” My head
is so into the next book, the work in progress, this is how I answer, but I see
immediately by the slightly confused look on his face that he meant the first
book. “Oh, that book.” I smile, close my eyes, and have to chuckle to myself a
little bit. How do I answer that? How do I explain that the metrics have
changed, that success has been re-defined in terms of how many books we’re able
to move out of our laundry room. Plus,
there’s a new house rule: no printing anything new until we clear out the existing
stock.
Since the tournament is local this
year, in Acton, I decide to swing out and catch part of the Beantown-Providence
game. It’s early September, 95 degrees and humid, yet there are the first
red-tipped leaves showing that fall is on its way, bringing to mind lines from
the poem, “blonde and sad skeletons, whistle, whistle,” by Virginia Rice Smith
(Sundress Publications, 2014):
“Through glass, map a world without
sound: wine
blue, lime-russet trees draping yellow
concrete – primary,
tangible. Death continues with brisk
affection
and red galls, leaf-tips lit like
nerve endings.”
“Green leaf, red leaf, green again.
Only August,
and already falling."
Along the sideline, I see only a few
players from my playing days, one actually still playing, a few involved with
coaching and refereeing, and another retiree just happening by. They seem not
to have aged a bit. I run into MaryBeth Mathews, who played for Beantown six
years, started the Portland WRFC in 1977, and has been coaching Bowdoin for 21 years.
Their team is well-represented at the tournament, and seems to be doing well. I
wonder aloud while talking to her, how things have changed over the years. I
had expected her answer to be maybe about funding, the level of support from
the college, the fitness level of women joining the team, or the changing organizational
structure and national requirements. Her answer: “It’s more about how things
haven’t changed, and maintaining the rugby culture.”
Now, since ‘rugby culture’ could mean
a lot of different things to different people, I ask her to expand on this. Her
answers hearken back to my first days of playing for the University of
Illinois.
“The rugby culture is inclusive, and
one built on respect. Everyone is welcome and can belong, which is huge to a
freshman woman just joining the team, and transitioning to college. There are no cuts, no tryouts. Everyone can
contribute to the team success. You don’t have to like everyone; it’s a big
team and they may not all be your best friends, but you do have to respect
everyone. The team had two slogans last year: #nostigma and #nodrama; #nostigma
meaning, within the team culture of respect, there are no negative labels for
being who you are, and #nodrama meaning, we’ll communicate about issues or
differences and avoid drama because we respect each other and because this is
what works.”
“Each person brings something to the
team. You may not be the fastest or strongest, but you may bring leadership
qualities, a great sense of humor, communication skills, a different cultural
background, a work ethic… And teammates are there for you - they’ll be there
with you when you’re down, and they’ll laugh and celebrate with you when things
are good.”
Coach Mathews applies
“athlete-centered coaching” – a “humanistic approach that enhances athlete
learning and development through sport. At its best, it shares power, enables
athletes to make decisions, and produces inspiring results from inspired people. The women know and buy
into the importance of strength and conditioning training for a contact sport;
they know they increase their chances of getting hurt if they’re not in shape.”
She also describes the transformational
leadership displayed by her players. The team had recently participated in a
workshop facilitated by the campus Resource Center for Sexual and Gender
Diversity, where they talked about why they played, why they make the
commitment of time and energy to the sport, and to each other, even showing up
to the workshop at nine o’clock on a Saturday morning, and the one thing that
never came up was winning.
“It has never been about the winning.”
Yet, the funny thing is that winning is just
what happens, when everything is aligned and clicking, when there is no fried
chicken in the clubhouse (Red Sox 2011), and everyone is pulling for each
other. Watch a rugby game. If you’re not playing, you’re on the sideline
watching and cheering on your teammates.
Congratulations to Bowdoin on an
undefeated season, and finishing fourth in the Division II National
Championships!
About
I have to confess, the night before I
dropped the books off at practice, I had a dream that I was looking for my
mouth guard. In my mind, in my dreams, I am still ready to play!
Virginia Rice Smith’s complete book of
poetry, When I Wake It Will Be Forever,
is available on Amazon.com. Virginia’s poems are both accessible and stand as
works of art, ready to be explored and savored again and again. The title of
the poem “blonde and sad skeletons, whistle, whistle,” is a variation on a line
translated from the poem, Trilce (XXVII), by Peruvian poet, César Vallejo.
MaryBeth Mathews played a total of six
years for Beantown, one as a member of the original team in the fall of 1976,
and again 1988 to 1992, returning to Beantown after starting Portland WRFC (1977
to 1986), and has been coaching Bowdoin for 21 years. Twenty-one years! Speaking
on the topic of coaching women’s rugby: “I could go on and on about these
topics (women, rugby, confidence, athlete-centered coaching, mindset) and maybe
it is my passion about these subjects and guiding a new crop of women that join
the team each year, through four years, that keeps coaching so invigorating,
challenging and rewarding for me.”
For more information about Bowdoin Women’s
Rugby Club, please visit their website: http://athletics.bowdoin.edu/sports/wrugby/index
For more info about Beantown, visit: http://beantownrugby.com/
Coming
Next
I will continue with this theme on women, girls, and confidence in the next post.
Post
Script
Happy New Year! Sorry about the
long silence, just busy celebrating the many miracles of the season (more
on miracles in a future post), Christmas, Hanukkah, and mailing my cards out
before Christmas for the first time in my life. Happy Martin Luther King Day. Hoping that someday we truly can all get along.
We are also now in the football playoff season, and hoping that Coach Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots have a few more miracles up their sleeves! Though, perhaps football could be a better, safer sport if it borrowed a few things from rugby, but this is also a topic for another day. Good luck Patriots!
A couple of quick health and safety
tips:
If you get jalapeño in your eye (perhaps while
making chili for the football game) – use milk as an eye wash. If you think you’re getting a cold or flu – take some elderberry syrup. There are a couple of locally produced versions from Vermont and Maine:
http://www.honeygardens.com/
http://www.mainemedicinals.com/
Switching to a more serious note -
My heart goes out to the citizens of
France, suffering terrorism on their streets, and grieving the loss of loved
ones. And also to the hundreds, if not thousands of people, reportedly mostly women
and children, killed by Boko Haram in Nigeria. And the Unknown Girl, perhaps not
even ten years old, who was used to set off a bomb in a market place also in the area
of Borno State, Nigeria. All of this, all within the past
couple of weeks. Nor has the world forgotten the 200 lost girls of Nigeria, taken
one night last April, we just don’t know what to do or where to look for you. What
is wrong with this world? There is a strong case to be made for expanding the
rugby culture as far and wide as we can, to create a world where all are
respected and can live in peace.
#NoStigma #NoDrama #BringBackOurGirls
References
Smith Rice, Virginia. 2014. When I Wake It Will Be Forever.
Knoxville: Sundress Publications.
©
2015 Rosemary A. Schmidt
Rose
Schmidt is the author of “Go Forward, Support! The Rugby of Life.” Use of individual quotes with proper citation and attribution, within the limits of fair use, is permitted. If you would
like to request permission to use or reprint any of the content on the site,
please contact the author.
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